Deadly Weapons
by Golden Snowflake
Summary: Kevin Barr has been an officer for the Peach Creek Police Department for five months when he meets a young man named Eddward on a domestic violence call. His frequent visits and intensifying concern for Eddward's safety are completely professional, though. Really.
1. Chapter 1

Deadly Weapons  
by Golden Snowflake  
xxx

**- Chapter 1 -**

The first time Officer Kevin Barr found himself on Eddward's doorstep was a routine disturbance call. A neighbor heard shouting, two men; glass was breaking and it was scaring her and her children. The dog in the heavily wooded yard across the street was barking frantically and vigilantly as he arrived.

Consciously breathing deeply, the young policeman drew his weapon and approached the house. He could hear screaming from the end of the short driveway. Before he had even gotten on the porch, there was an immense crash.

"_Peach Creek Police Department; come to the door now_." Five months and it still sounded like a joke coming from his uncertain mouth. He waited and heard a grunt and then a pause. The dog across the street yelped hysterically.

"_Police! Open the door now_."

A hoarse, deep voice came from inside. "Everything's fine. We don't need any help."

"Open the door now," Kevin called, and when the man replied again, closer, he lifted his gun, his heart pounding in his ears.

"_We don't need any help,_ sir, everything's under control."

The redhead edged forward and tried the door, finding it unlocked. Tensing as he steeled himself for what he might find, he threw it open and recaptured his gun with both hands. "Peach Creek Police Department! Hands where I can see them, _now_."

The figure closer to him was taller and wiry, muscles standing out through his dingy white wife-beater. The one behind him was small, slim, with black hair and huge eyes. There was a streak of blood running from his upper lip.

"Officer, we were just having a discussion," the man with shaggy blonde hair half-yelled, hands hovering by his ears as he shifted his weight. "Everything's completely under control."

"Hands on your head. Back toward me _slowly_."

The man half-turned toward him, rolling his bright blue eyes. "Sir, I _told_ you, there's no reason for you to be here-"

Running out of patience, Kevin approached him in two quick strides and wrenched one sweaty wrist behind the man's back while sheathing his gun with the other. "I _said_ put your hands on your head," he growled, snapping a handcuff onto the blonde before he had the chance to pull away. There were papers scattered everywhere and a chair was overturned near the pair. The smaller male staggered backward, whimpering as Kevin cuffed his aggressor. The blonde jerked hard when the redhead took his other arm, but Kevin held his wrist in place, shoving it down to the open handcuff as soon as the man stopped struggling.

"I didn't do anything _wrong_, officer."

Pushing him toward the front door, Kevin forced himself to speak as if he hadn't just been afraid for his life. "You're under arrest for disturbing the peace and domestic battery."

"I don't understand, everything was under control," the wiry man protested, stumbling onto the grass as Barr walked him to the cruiser.

"We can throw resisting arrest in there too if you want."

At that, the guy shut up. Kevin eased him down into the back seat and shut the door, straightening up and letting himself gasp for breath. A curtain pulled back from a neighboring house's window fell into place and caught his eye; the dog next door was yapping softly, still unsure whether things had returned to normal.

It took him a moment to find himself. Kevin sighed and pulled the notebook from his pocket before returning to the house.

The boy inside looked to be around Kevin's age if not a little younger, his eyes dark and immense and his black hair clinging to his cheekbones. "Sir, can you tell me what happened here?"

"It was just a minor altercation."

His voice was raspy and soft. His hands trembled at his sides.

"Please, just for procedure." Kevin pulled the pen out of the little notebook's spiral. "I just need to know how this all took place."

The young man's eyes were owlish. He blinked back tears, grimacing as he bit back a sob. The blood on his lip had dried into an ugly black crescent. "We were talking and we - we had a disagreement. We may have raised our v-voices but … I promise, officer, it won't happen again. I'm so, so sorry for causing the neighborhood any trouble."

Kevin swallowed, unable to come up with the words to convince the man that this was necessary. "I'll just document your injuries, sir. Let me get my camera turned on - can you give me your name?"

"Eddward Vincent," he ravenette murmured softly. "Eddward with two d's."

The cheap digital camera beeped as Kevin took pictures of the swollen, bloody lip and a bruise on the man's pale shoulder that was too dark to be more than a few minutes old. "Do you have any injuries from the altercation other than your shoulder and the-" Kevin gestured at his full lips, thrown off-balance by the individual's painfully fragile demeanor.

"No, no." He sniffed, backing away and drawing his arms around himself. "No, he - he didn't mean it. Things escalated and he struck me and he-"

"Okay, okay, Eddward, that's okay." Kevin flipped the notebook shut and took a cautious step forward, reaching out to touch his arm. "That's definitely enough for the report - for me to work with. Right now he's going to jail on charges of disturbance and domestic battery, but you'll need to press charges separately if you want a restraining order on him. Is the house in your name, sir?" He could feel his voice softening in response to the young man's terrified shaking. Eddward didn't jerk away when Kevin touched his baggy sleeve, but he seemed to tighten in on himself impossibly, arched brows pinching together as he squeezed his eyes shut.

"No," he whispered, "I don't want to press any charges."

The redhead was stunned.

"Sir, I - Eddward, it's clear to me - not only me, but the whole neighborhood what's going on here. I don't know if this is a routine thing and nobody's called it in before or if this is a first-time thing for him, but this kind of situation isn't safe. You're injured, and he isn't. I'll ask him of course, and inspect him, but it's obvious he was the aggressor."

Eddward whimpered, refusing to look up.

"Look I - I can't force you to file against him, but come on, man, you can't let things get to this point. It's … it's my job to keep people safe, and I can't do that if you let people into your home that are violent like this."

"I know," the man barely breathed. "I know."

"Now, he's probably not gonna be in for very long. I don't know if he's your roommate or just a friend or what, but please, you need to start looking for better people to hang around with."

"I know. He's not coming back here."

"Okay." Kevin nodded, putting a hand on his hip. His stomach sank as his gaze wandered over the hideous blot on the young man's delicate collarbone. "Do you need any medical attention tonight?"

"No." The boy's voice was thick with barely-restrained tears. "No, I'm fine."

"All right," said Barr, even though he didn't know what to do and everything was profoundly _not_ all right. "Please call us if you get into any trouble, okay, Eddward?"

Nodding hastily, he rasped, "Okay."

Feeling like he was going to be ill, Officer Barr headed back to his car and the blonde man as the ravenette closed the door behind him.

* * *

**A/N: **Surprise! This is a story I've been toying with for a while now, based on a drawing by c2ndy2c1d of cop!Kevin and delinquent!Edd. I also watch hours of Cops everyday while writing and doing homework, so that probably helped. I know this is a complete disaster technically and that there's tons of procedural stuff you don't see on television, but I also wanted Kevin to still be kind of unsure of himself and forgetful, too. I hope that's an adequate excuse for how bad this is. ~*v*~

I've been obsessed with Ed Edd n' Eddy since spring break and that's like a third of a year oops


	2. Chapter 2

Deadly Weapons  
by Golden Snowflake  
xxx

**- Chapter 2 -**

The second time Kevin met Eddward was about three months later.

Life had gone on as before; eating late at night, falling asleep with the TV on and waking up a few hours later to stumble off to pee. Scalding showers to burn the sleep from his skin, his belt with fifty pounds of radios and Tasers and little carbon-copy notebooks that still felt unsettlingly more like a Halloween costume than a uniform. The occasional call to his parents who were less worried than he'd expected about his career choice (he wasn't sure whether he was relieved or hurt yet.) He issued parking tickets to furious soccer moms and took wannabe thugs to jail while their girlfriends wept on the porches. He talked drunk people out of bars and chased drunk teenagers away from parties and occasionally got to help in a takedown, always ending in bruises and scraped elbows and embarrassed handshakes with fellow officers. A few cute girls approached him when his coworkers talked him into going out to eat, but he swallowed down the swell of lust and always graciously declined them. He wasn't one for getting a girl's hopes up only to disappoint them, and to Kevin Barr, that was the only foreseeable outcome.

The young man's life continued to slowly unfurl and time passed.

The chief flicked him in the back of the head one morning as he stood, zombielike, in the doorway of the police station with a Styrofoam cup of coffee. Rubbing the spot contemptuously, he squinted at the man and followed as his boss grinned teasingly and beckoned with one hand. The rest of their meager force was already in Chief's office, and Herbert waved at Kevin cheerily as the redhead plopped on the dented coffee table pushed into the far corner.

"As you all know, this month kicks off our drug crackdown. We'll be making some controlled buys downtown of the park where you all know most of our deals take place. You guys will also patrol some of the lesser areas we've done a high amount of arrests in a couple nights out of the week. And since you all know how much I like to screw with ya, you'll be pickin' routes out of a hat."

Johnson scratched his nose before putting his hand in the air.

"Ellen's making more coffee, Johns."

Turning red, Johnson looked at his feet. Kevin chuckled.

The sun had just slipped beneath the tree line when Kevin turned onto the road leading to a middle-class neighborhood, his gaze flicking from one lit window to the next. A young couple sat together on a porch swing, their faces close together. There was a heavy woman on the other side of the road, her hair tied back with a bandana. She was calling to someone, but until Kevin had almost reached her, he didn't see the handful of chickens wandering loose around the yard. He laughed out loud, shaking his head as he passed. He listened to the brief conversation between Herbert and Easten over the radio and breathed in the delicious smell of leaves just beginning to change color. He'd been down this road to make arrests a few times before, but most of the homes looked fairly well-kept, though some of the residents seemed a little odd. He had almost reached the cul-de-sac at the end of the lane when a man approached him waving a hand to slow him down.

"How's it going?" Kevin leaned his elbow on the window as he stopped. The guy approached him cautiously, a look of urgency on his face.

"Somethin's goin' on in that house. The red one. There."

"Can you explain what you think is happening?" The man's gaunt face twisted strangely at the question.

"Something bad," he responded, then shook his head, sending his dreadlocks falling over his shoulders. "Something bad. Please check on them, Officer."

"Okay." Kevin nodded when the man backed away, looking either way anxiously and stopping once his feet were off the asphalt. "Thank you, sir. Stay safe tonight."

"Thank you," the guy called after Kevin had pulled away, a note of hysteria in his voice. Squinting as he pulled into the driveway, the redhead tried to remember why the house seemed familiar.

As he put the cruiser in park, the front door flew open and a slim, dark-skinned man trotted out. His eyes went wide at the sight of a police car, and as Kevin shut the cruiser off and stepped out, he broke into a sprint. The redhead bolted after him, struggling to speak clearly enough to be understood into his radio. "10-36 in progress. All available units respond."

The man glanced back to find Kevin pursuing him, his face morphing into one of complete horror.

"_Police,_" Barr shouted, hopping nimbly over a cluster of flowers and narrowly missing a beach ball deflating next to it. "_Get on the ground now._"

"I ain't do nothin', man!" The guy leapt over a picket fence with remarkable agility. Kevin steeled himself, knowing the entire neighborhood was watching or soon would be, and scrambled over the fence as gracefully as possible.

"I should arrest you for that grammar," he shouted, and as the guy skittered into the cul-de-sac, the sound of sirens appeared, bouncing off of the pavement as two Peach Creek police cars tore down the street. Freezing in place as headlights fell on his frame, the man turned around, his mouth falling open.

"I ain't _do_ nothin," he wailed again, and Kevin bowled him over.

"Put your hands behind your back," Kevin shouted into the guy's armpit, scrabbling to get to his knees without removing his weight from the man's torso.

"Why you hurting me, man? I didn't do nothin' wrong!"

"Why'd you run?" Kevin shifted his weight, grabbing for the man's arms. Grunting in exaggerated agony, the man wriggled his arms under himself. The redhead pressed down on his shoulders with either hand, holding him in place.

"You _scared_ me, dude! _You're hurting me!_"

"Why would you run from the police if you didn't do noth-anything?"

"I told you, you scared me, man! Stop _hurting_ me! I want a lawyer!"

"Rad," Barr uttered sarcastically, pushing the squirming guy into the ground as the shouts of two of his coworkers echoed behind him. Easten and Horowitz landed on top of him, the bumping of elbows and knees into cheekbones and ribs ensuing until Easten announced that he had the guy's arms ("I got it I got it I got it I GOT IT.") Kevin stumbled back and heaved a sigh of relief, nodding when Horowitz repeatedly asked him if he was okay after being kicked in the shin. A little girl was leaning out of a second story window, pointing and shouting something over and over again as the lights flashed across the siding like an impromptu rave. The hands of someone older reached around her, clamping over her mouth and pulling her gently back inside.

"I'll take him back," Easten wheezed, sweat glistening on his upper lip. Whipping his head back to the babbling suspect, he bellowed, "WHY'D YOU RUN?"

Barr nodded and shrugged sheepishly when Horowitz told him that he'd done a nice job, and as Easten loudly asked people to go back inside and dragged the protesting man toward his car, the redhead turned back to the small house where his pursuit had begun.

The door was still open, warm light spilling out onto the grass. A small figure was huddled on the doorstep.

"Peach Creek Police Department," he announced, approaching the silhouette leaning against the door. "Do you know the individual who just fled from me?"

"Yes," the young man responded, and Kevin knew immediately why the house seemed familiar. "I know him."

"We're questioning him now, but do you know why he ran?"

Eddward blinked his immense eyes, shaking his head slowly. "I'm not sure."

"Can I - may I come in?"

The raven-haired man nodded, backing out of the way. The house was the same as before with its cathedral ceiling and large, open doorways. There was very little clutter. Eddward seemed to shrink in on himself when Kevin turned to face him, gripping handfuls of his oversized sweater and lowering his head.

"If we search him, will we find anything illegal? Drugs, stolen IDs, unregistered firearms?"

The smaller man shook his head. "I honestly don't know."

"Eddward, are you sure?"

Startled at Kevin having remembered him, he blinked up at the redhead. "Y-yes. I'm sure."

Barr nodded, chewing on his upper lip in thought. "Okay. Are you okay?"

"I'm all right," the ravenette mumbled softly. Kevin's gaze burned into his eyes and he looked away, face reddening.

Kevin stepped closer, eyes wandering down the man's small frame. He was on the cusp of being too skinny, and his lips were badly chapped. "Are you sure?"

"I'm fine, officer."

"And you're sure that you don't know why he ran?"

Eddward nodded again, and Kevin caught a whiff of his scent. Musky but faint. No trace of alcohol or marijuana. He opened his mouth to speak, hesitated, and went with his instinct.

"Are you in an intimate relationship with him?"

Eddward squeezed his arms until his knuckles went white, screwing his eyes shut and ducking his head. It reminded Kevin of how a puppy flinched when afraid it was going to be struck.

Swallowing, Kevin looked away. "Don't you think you deserve better? Whatever the nature of your relationship. These junkie-types seem to keep finding you and there has to be a reason for that. What happens if someone leaves something in your house? Don't tell me the guy in the back of Easten's car would take the fall for you."

Voices rang out from down the road and a chilly breeze drifted into the house. Barr looked back to see goosebumps rising on the pale skin of the man's throat.

"I don't know what's going on here - drugs, some form or prostitution … please don't let him back into your house."

"Okay," Eddward rasped. His long eyelashes were glistening with moisture.

"He's going to jail tonight for alluding arrest and almost definitely for possession of an illegal substance. If you need any kind of assistance when it comes to people who pose a risk to your safety, that's what I'm here for."

Biting his lip, the small male nodded again.

Kevin backed away, stepping out into the cold of the night. When he looked back, Eddward hadn't moved a muscle, his eyes squeezed shut and his arms wrapped tightly around his body.

"Be safe, okay, man?"

"Okay."

Forcing himself to look away, the redhead closed the door softly and trotted back to where Easten and Horowitz were testing a small baggie of white powder on the trunk of Easten's cruiser.


	3. Chapter 3

Deadly Weapons  
by Golden Snowflake  
xxx

**- Chapter 3 -**

The third time Officer Kevin Barr encountered Eddward Vincent was just after leaving his cousin's birthday party, and in three seconds the drowsy ease of being full of cake and sparkling grape juice had been stripped away to an ice-cold, sickening horror.

Dispatch recounted a call that had just come in: a man reporting an assault that was in progress, although little more than his address could be heard over the shouting and a distinct crash in the background. She was halfway into the address when Kevin pulled into a gas station parking lot and floored it toward the opposite side of town.

Time had slowed to a crawl in Kevin's life, in sophomore social studies, fourth grade math; during dinners at his grandma's and in line at McDonald's with no air conditioning and the buzz of a push-mower from just over the fence, so dauntingly, immensely slow that it felt almost unreal. And yet, as he mapped out the construction areas and watched his lights reflect on tailgates for a brief moment before streaking past them, time seemed to move so quickly that he felt almost frozen in place behind his speedometer.

The road was empty when he arrived, or at least that was how he remembered it. He was the first one there and was momentarily angry at this as he threw open his door and sprinted across the dew-covered grass, drawing his gun and skipping two of the porch steps as he shifted to shoulder the weak spot just under the latch.

The figure was tall and slim and his hands seemed almost black in the dim light of the cheap kitchen chandelier, disappearing into the deathly-pale flesh of the smaller man's neck, squeezing so tightly that Kevin swore he could hear arteries popping. Sheathing his gun, he was on the man immediately. He locked his arms around the man's biceps and pulled him off balance, dragging him back as he released the squirming figure pressed against the wall and slamming a knee into the center of the man's back. Eddward sank to the floor, a shrill sound escaping his throat as he gasped for breath. Blood poured from his nose and mouth and his shirt was torn apart to reveal a hideous trail of bruises peppering his ribcage. Kevin turned back to his attacker, who was curling slowly into a ball, groaning softly as he fought to remain conscious after the blow to his spine.

Pulling his handcuffs from his belt, the redhead shoved the tall man back down to face the floor. "_Stay down_."

The tiny figure behind him sobbed, his shrill, screaming breaths broken by pitiful whimpers. Kevin cuffed the suspect, and as the mass beneath him began twitching and the metal clicked into place around his skinny wrists, the shouts of Horowitz and Landon, the newest recruit, echoed through the cul-de-sac. "Finally," Kevin snapped, only removing his knee from the man's spine when the other officers' footsteps were almost at the door.

"_Jesus_," Landon breathed, his blue eyes huge as he stared at the tiny man huddled against the wall and the freakishly tall man curled up before Kevin, arms straining against his restraints as his face grew pale. "You took him down all by yourself?"

"Get over here and help me get him up," Horowitz shouted. The middle-aged man was already kneeling beside the groaning suspect, hefting him upwards as the younger officer rushed over to help him, glancing nervously at the fury written on the redhead's face. The pair dragged the suspect outside on shaky legs, Landon freeing a hand to radio in that the suspect was in custody.

Kevin was on his knees before the black-haired boy, yanking down his rolled-up sleeve to dab at the blackened blood on his lips. "_Fuck_. What the fuck was that all about?"

The smaller man sobbed pitifully, his hands shaking violently as he raised them to grip Barr's shirt. "Don't - I don't know-"

"Fucking son of a bitch. I'll kill him. I'll-"

"No, please." Tears streamed down his face as Eddward leaned against him, hiccupping pitifully as Kevin began to feel his shoulders and back for any breaks or concealed punctures. "Please. It's my fault. Don't l-lose your job…"

"Fuck," Kevin hissed again. He held the ravenette's head in his hands for a moment, thumb smearing away blood and tears as he blinked up at Kevin. "Think I've seen him before. Breaking and entering. Maybe vandalism. Mother fucking piece of shit."

"Y-you're shaking," Eddward observed softly.

"I - of course I am," the redhead barked, his heartbeat still pounding in his ears. "Jesus."

To Kevin's disbelief, at this the smaller man laughed softly.

"Shit." The redhead leaned back, his hands on the petite man's shoulders holding him at a distance. "Are you- where are you hurt? No stab wounds, gunshots, sub-dermal self-destructing nanobots?"

It was something he asked all the time to lighten the mood, but when it rattled out, the ravenette choked out a half-sob, half-laugh and squeezed where his fingers had curled around Barr's broad shoulders. "No."

"We're calling medical for you. There'll be an ambulance here shortly." He was dabbing Eddward's face again, cleaning the blood from his chin and gingerly from under his nose.

"Everything w-was fine," the smaller of the two whispered, and tears flowed down his cheeks once more. "One minute everything was fine and then … it's my fault, I … s-said something I shouldn't have. I didn't think I - I didn't think he would-"

"Fuck that," Kevin interrupted, cupping the shuddering figure's jaw with one hand as he tried to stifle the flow from his split lip with the cuff of his sleeve. "Fuck him."

"Barr," called Horowitz, and the redhead looked up to see his colleague out in the yard, radio in hand as the frenetic strobe of cruiser lights danced on the trees behind him. "Medical's almost here."

"Affirmative," Kevin shouted back. "I'm gonna help you up. Can you stand?"

Eddward had fallen silent, overtaken with tremors. He nodded. Barr slid an arm behind his back gingerly, waiting until the smaller male had gripped onto his shirt tightly to hoist him to his feet. "Thank you."

"Don't. This is my job, man. Fucks like him don't deserve to walk the streets with decent people."

"Would you p-please mind your language, Officer?" A vague smile played on his lips as the redhead walked him across the room. "You _are_ in my house."

As they stopped on the doorstep, Kevin had a moment to stare at him in amazement before the ambulance arrived. He stood in the yard, looking out over the neighborhood long after the EMTs had eased him inside and departed; long after he explained the scene to Horowitz and watched the other two cruisers leave for the county penitentiary.

It wasn't until late the next morning that he realized his shirt was soaked through with blood and that he should probably go out and buy a replacement.

* * *

**A/N: **_/shipping intensifies/_

Huagh. Here I am! I feel like this chapter was rushed, but I just wanted to get it done. School started two weeks ago, so I've been scrambling to order my books and stuff without my professors realizing that I don't have them yet. My criminal justice class in particular makes me want to finish this story. :3 I'll try to have the next chapter posted within a week.

Thank you guys so much for your wonderful reviews. The next chapter is planned to be the last one unless you guys aren't satisfied with the ending. You can, uh. Let me know. By reviewing and stuff.

:y

Hasta luego, dorks.


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